I suppose I should start with the catalyst for everything. I went to San Diego from May 21 - 29 to vacation between my spring and summer terms at college. A very, very dear friend of mine lives there, and so I stayed with him. It was there and through him that I have started to explore an entire new dimension of myself that I never dreamed could exist. There are many facets to the different revelations and epiphanies I had, but basically, I'm becoming enlightened. I'm learning so many things -- mindfulness, chakras, gemstones and crystals, meditation, yoga, intuition, empath, Reiki, energy healing, and more. Tonight I had a very profound experience that I believe is a large step forward for me in this process. And that is what this blog is all about: the journey I am taking into my spirituality and enlightenment.
Before I begin the story, I do want to make a quick note about the title of the blog. It comes from the movie Tangled, the song being "I See the Light." The lyrics resonated very much with me tonight after my experience, and I felt it was appropriate to title the blog and URL as such. :)
Tonight had marked a difficult 24 hours for me since I had arrived home from the aforementioned vacation. I hadn't wanted to leave San Diego. Desperately. I loved the weather, the cultures, the food, the palm trees, the oceans and mountains. I wanted to spend more time with my friend Troy. I had felt so free and nurtured and understood in San Diego. I had felt like I really belonged there. Coming back to the Midwest felt like being shoved back into a cage I had managed to escape. My trap muscles ached all the way into my neck. My lower back killed. Finally I decided I would try a sea salt soak. I had heard about the many benefits and figured at the very least, it might improve my mood.
Relaxing piano music? Check. Candles? Check. Big, fluffy towel? Check. Rock? Check.
Rock?
Yes, rock. On a whim (possibly my intuition at work), I decided to take with me a small black rock about the size of my palm that I had found while on the beach with Troy at Santa Monica. I didn't really understand why I had the urge, but I followed it. Once everything was prepared, I settled into the bath and tried desperately to relax. Though the hot water felt amazing, I couldn't get my mind to settle. I was thinking about how much I wanted to be back in San Diego, how badly my muscles hurt, what a despondent mood I was in.
I had set the rock on the side of the tub, and as my frustration with how un-relaxing this bath was turning out to be grew, I picked it up. At first, I turned it about in my hands. It's an incredibly smooth, flat rock, perfect for skipping on the water (if you know how to, anyway). I decided to settle my mind on whatever it wanted to. Closing my eyes, it first went to the many memories of my trip, as well as previous memories I have of Troy and myself. I'm unsure how much longer it was until I started to feel an inexplicable but unmistakable sort of resonance or presence start to emerge from the rock. It was surprising, but not alarming or overwhelming. It seemed to embody a sense of strength and resilience. I felt myself begin to relax as I took in the dominant feeling of strength.
Another whim (again, intuition?) came to me, and I pressed the rock to my sternum, above the heart chakra. This may sound completely strange, but I swear I could practically hear a voice from the rock speaking to me.
"Remember Troy's words about having so much chatter in your head that you can't enjoy the moment? Be still. Be in this moment, for there is nothing but this moment. Your breath in this moment."
My mind was slowly becoming more and more quiet.
My mind was slowly becoming more and more quiet.
"You will be okay where you are. You have the strength to do anything. Do not worry about the coming year, or the coming month, or tomorrow. Tomorrow does not exist. There is only this moment. Tomorrow does not exist."
As I meditated on these words and on my breathing, I felt the tense muscles in my back and neck loosen and release. I realized that this moment was a lesson in quieting my mind to allow the present to happen. Like all beginners, I wasn't perfect at it. I contemplated this blog, the words of this first post, before catching myself and focusing instead on what I felt around me. It happened several times, but by the time I was ready to get out, I felt completely restored and at peace. Before I set the rock back on the side of the tub, I kissed it in gratitude without even thinking about it.
I pulled the plug and let the water drain around me. As it did so, I imagined all of the negative energy that had been stored inside of me flowing out with the water, going down the drain, out of me, leaving only positive feelings. It helped to further my newfound sense of well-being.
And so the two big lessons I am taking with me from tonight are:
Silence the chatter in your mind to fully enjoy the moment happening around you and;
Silence the chatter in your mind to fully enjoy the moment happening around you and;
Tomorrow does not exist. There is only this very moment.
Love and harmony all of your days.
What a beautiful experience to have - to experience such a grounding, and to intuitively allow the energy to flow out of you with the water. What you are describing is the kind of meditative healing practice which often takes people years to come to. :)
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on your beautiful opening - it was such a pleasure to have you visit - and even more joyful to hear about all that you are now experiencing. :)
Namaste. _/|\_